Reflections and memories

It is hard to believe that a decade has passed and we are now at the start of a new year and decade.  

So as I sit with a cup of tea and reminisce, by far the greatest thing that I have had the joy of sharing, creating and nurturing has been my son, Dexter.  His birth came at a time which also saw me go through my biggest heartache, the loss of my mother.  Remarkable to believe that the little bundle I held in my arms at almost the start of the last decade would not only soothe my aching heart, but also repaired it and make it stronger and bigger.  The journey I embarked upon during the last decade saw me forced to grow up to realise that I had to step up to being the bedrock for my son, the mother, friend and anchor for him the way my Mum had been for me.  This he rewarded far more than he can even imagine and he continues to do so each and every day.  So when I think back over the last decade the thing I am proud of doing well (and I hope I continue to do so over the following years and decades) is becoming a Mummy that my son loves with all his heart, and knowing that my own Mum would be proud of that and in herself for giving me the tools to be what she was to me.

Those eyes just melt my heart.

With fond farewell I raise a glass to you in honour, with love and deepest respect.  Whilst you may not be there to share this with me now or in the future, I know that looking at this old photograph you did this about something as I now do to you.  I miss you very much but you live on in me and in Dexter.

This January sees the anniversary of my first date with Anders!  That first date happened 22 years ago - yes indeed, 22 years ago who would have thought and we were not childhood sweethearts either!  We have not been married quite so long, but this year will see us celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary - two decades that is something to be proud of achieving - WOW.

Those are therefore some things to reflect on positively but what has happened more recently?

Well I started the blog in April of last year and since doing it, I have come to see that there have been many things that have happened that have made me smile and that is something I am grateful for as I can look back and see the good things that happened.  For example celebrating the first birthdays of Marvin and Carly which saw me make them edible birthday cakes full of doggie treats including the plate which the cakes were presented on - yep I can make doggie cakes but don't think the guy on the Ace of Cakes needs to worry about me steeling his thunder!

Talking of beloved pets, we said goodbye to our lovely Wee Girl at the age of 19.  That was a hard not only because she had been with us since Anders and I married, but also, it happened so suddenly on a Monday morning which meant Dexter had to see death happen so unexpectedly.  It was therefore a huge surprise when we found at the cat and dog rescue a cat that was her double and named Dexter, just like our son!

A year and a decade which was full of positives and negatives.  The losses of loved ones, and the entry of wonderful new ones and as I write this I am reminded that that is life, one door closes and another door opens to the start of a new chapter.

Catching bubbles of opportunity and taking a journey, that is what each year is all about.....

I have been inspired by other people who I have gotten to know via blogging who in turn have inspired me to do things like "creating a memory" .  That was inspired by a post on Leigh vs laundry.  

This blog however would not have happened if it had not been for my i-phone.  This fantastic gadget was the thing that got me back into photography and when I think about the years I didn't take photographs - arghhhhh.  

Memories not captured or never taken like this one I found lying on the promenade by the beach......

On the positive however I did get back into it as a result of this little apple in my eye gadget, writing my blog and reading other blog sites whose authors have become really special to me.  As a result I have become inspired and challenged in ways that I never ever thought possible and I am really grateful for that.   On the subject of my musings it is so very flattering to have not only my blog looked at but to have followers and comments given on it which I really do appreciate.  I know that you don't have to leave a comment, read any of my posts or indeed feel the urge to want to see anything that I write, photograph or muse over, so please know that I don't take it for granted and I would like to thank each and every one of you for spending time over at RMontalban's place.  You rock, genuinely really and truly rock and I am very grateful for that and hope that you will continue to find what I do of interest to you.

Inspiration lighting up

There are many things that make me laugh and too many to mention when I see that I did 661 posts last year - yeh I know, amazing how the i-phone is so easy (camera isn't quite as quick though as there is a lot more downloading and stuff to do there)!  Some of these 661 posts  I have shared with the Happiness Project which again Leigh hosts every week but more importantly what this blog has done is made me realise that even though life is not always a fluffy box of candy, you can find things little things that make you happy each and every day if you chose to see them like....

Showing my son how to make a daisy chain

 To Mummy with love

Laughing at a devilish husband who said he would share some chocolate and then ate it all himself to save me gaining weight!

Wearing high heals and having perfect points for ballet - even though I would be more of the sugar plum fairy if I ever graced the stage dancing!

 Singing at the Jamie Cullum concert! 

I love how my son dresses up - I love his costumes and characters he makes up and I love capturing his moments and that of other people I see.

It could be you!

Are you frightened?  Ha, ha, ha, I would be too......

The above photograph is featured over at Lenscratch along with other amazing Favourite photographs by wonderful artists.  I am so very grateful to Aline Smithson who felt that two of my entries (Family entry was featured on Thanksgiving) were good enough to be included amongst such talented individuals and as a result of what to me is a huge accolade it has made me really wonder about what possibilities there could be out there at some point in the future.  

The Lenscratch blog along with the Elizabeth Avedon site (Elizabeth Avedon was actually was the catalyst for me daring to see if I was good enough to be featured in Lenscratch) have been hugely inspirational to me and have made me really think more about what I photograph and why and that is really rather exciting and scary as this journey doesn't have a destination in sight yet as I really don't know what destinations are potentially out there if you know what I mean other than just being wrapped up in the fun of it all as a form of realism and escapism but maybe that should be enough!

Like a dutch master painting, my two boys seem to fill my life with pleasure in everything they do and everything we do and see together.

Will this be me and Anders in years to come?

My family (minus the cat)

Clackers!

Who has been sleeping in our bed?  

So when I look back at 2010, I can see that it has been filled with lots of things, some things have been fleeting moments captured like Clackers above (which did make me laugh and still does), and others have been longer like our weekend camping during the summer or to Barcelona, or the drives we took around Scotland which took whole days during weekends.  The main thing is that I captured over 661 of them because of this blog and my i-phone and now camera and I am so thankful for that.

Even an i-phone can capture macro!

As for the decade that has just passed, well there are so many things that have happened, if only I had captured what I had seen then but I can't go back in time I can only move forward.....

..... so with that what for 2011?  I hope to capture everything and anything; be able to make sense of it all and turn it into something positive and worthy of writing about and posting (my that is a tall order).  I can see that I am starting to edit, but how this editing evolution and journey will be transpire I do not know and that is scary to think about.  

The only thing I therefore wish is for is that the destination to be one which provides happiness, love, joy, prosperity, success, luck and fulfilment and for the journey to be a smooth and enjoyable which you will enjoy reading and might even inspire you too.  Not only that but I hope my wish extends to all of you too here's to 2011 and the next decades being great ones for us all.